


Down the Rabbit Holt

by AleesShu



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Dorks, F/M, Fake Marriage, Human AU, Hunay is minor in this, Hunk is a cinnamon roll, Lance (Voltron) is a Mess, Lance and Matt get themselves into some shit, M/M, Minor Hunay, Modern AU, Pan Matt, They’ve gone too far down the rabbit hole and they certainly aren’t named Alice
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2018-05-18
Packaged: 2019-05-08 15:54:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14697453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AleesShu/pseuds/AleesShu
Summary: Lance and Matt are pranksters who don't know when to stop and they end up a little too far down the relationship rabbit hole...





	Down the Rabbit Holt

**Author's Note:**

> I decked out chapter one in exactly an hour as a challenge to myself and wha'd'y'know it was long enough to post for a fic so here we are.

Matt Holt did not plan to get married until his late 20’s. He did not plan for his friends to be idiots. He did not plan for harmless flirting to turn into a best-friendship where innocent jokes would be mistaken for much more. But, Matt figured he was also an idiot for not foreseeing the situation he was currently in.

Two weeks ago Matt, Lance, and all of their friends were hanging out playing video games, half-assing pillow fights, and just generally playing drinking games while watching the Shrek movies. Matt and Lance were not at all known for their Mario Kart prowess (not like they had any to begin with) and it happened to lead to the last place losing sprees that got the two of them drunk off their asses.

Of course, Matt was a heavier weight than Lance, so he was slightly less drunk but that didn’t change anything. So when Lance had climbed up from using Matt as a body pillow to use the bathroom, his friends turned with raised eyebrows and smirks to judge him because the two had never really ‘cuddled’ like that did that night.

Matt would never be entirely sure if it was the alcohol or just his friends being idiots (though it was most likely a mix of both) that led to them teasing him about liking Lance. Calling him out on being a body-pillow for the Cuban boy. Joking about how the two were constantly shooting pick-up line after pick-up line at each other in a game of back and forth.

When Lance returned from the bathroom they all turned around as if nothing was wrong. They were all having a sleepover that night anyway, so when Matt told Lance about the whole experience, Lance lightly threw a pillow at Matt, affirming that he shouldn’t worry about everyone else.

Well… when the group went for pizza the next morning as was their tradition after sleepovers, Lance whipped out a ring in the middle of the pizzeria. Matt knew it was just a joke at their expense if they were dumb enough to fall for it… _“Matthew Holt- since you spilled spaghettios on me at Shiro’s house, I’ve had the Ouran Host Club theme play in my head as you were in the room. You are the Tamaki to my Haruhi. Would you bestow upon my well-toned shoulders the weight of loving you forever?”_

They both understood it was a joke, they’d had the conversation about how they’d each want to be proposed to, or how they’d propose a million times. Lance, of course, would be elegant, romantic, suave, and a gentleman. He’d say sweet words and recite poems to his lover during the proposal, not chain memes from an inside joke list they had from that one time they binged Ouran together.

So of course, Matt responded the same way any sane person would. _“Oh of course! But only if you’d do me the honor as well!” They both smiled, trying to hide the fact they both wanted to laugh so hard they couldn’t breathe, as Lance stood up, pecking a kiss on Matt’s cheek just for accuracy._

_“FINALLY YOU TWO!” Pidge shouted, shoving her phone away into her pocket. “Pidge it’s just a-” Matt started, going to enlighten his little sister with the fact that it was all a joke. There was no actual proposal and both Matt and Lance knew it. Shiro was holding his dad smile as he rested his chin on his fist. “You guys could’ve at least said you were dating. But I’m happy for you.”_

_“Lance! Why didn’t you tell me, bro?” Hunk interrupted as the table broke into mixed messages of celebration and joking at the fact Matt and Lance never really said they were a couple… even though they weren’t. This gave Lance full liberty to lean up to Matt and whisper his next greatest scheme._

_“Let’s see how far down the rabbit hole they’ll go, huh?”_

“Lance I think we’ve gone too far down the rabbit hole…” Matt moaned over the wedding advertisements they’d been piling up lately. “Probably, but I mean, it’s not like we’ve made any actual commitment to this yet.” Lance propped his chair up on its hind two legs, rocking back and forth with a shrug and a smile.

Matt sat up, shooting a quick glare at his ‘fiance’ and groaning. “Everyone expects us too though. You aren’t actually thinking about dishing out money for a fake wedding are you?” Lance plopped the chair down and seamlessly slid into a position where he looked both maniacal and at peace with his head propped on his hands.

“What’s wrong Matty? Afraid you’ll want it to be real?” A smirk danced onto his lips with the latter sentence. Matt swat his hand in the air, “Of course not. But what’s the point of spending money neither of us have just for a prank? Besides, how would your mom react if she thought her son was getting married and she never met the boyfriend? Or your dad even...”

Lance’s demeanor immediately faltered at the thought. He only wanted to prank his friends, but getting families involved would be taking it too far. “I guess I see your point, but what about your family? Doesn’t your mom call Pidge like every night to make sure she’s safe and okay?”

Matt, once again, should’ve known better. Pidge never learned about the national no-snitching policy, so if she had tea to spill, she’d spill it, and Matt was almost always (and would most likely always be) the janitor to clean up said spilled tea. His sister was a strange case… He loved her, but she was also a gremlin demon.  
“I should- I need to go make a call.” Matt pushed himself up from the table and pulled his phone from it. Lance watched him leave the kitchen with a sigh. If his mom found out what he was doing, he’d be dead. He could imagine his tombstone now, ‘Lance McClain 1994 - 2018, He went too far down the rabbit hole.”

It was a nice ideal in some senses besides the fact the death year would be 2018 and he planned to live until at the very least age 61. A specific number, but that was unimportant information. But it wasn’t that Lance thought his mom wouldn’t approve of Matt in the very unlikely hypothetical that Matt actually became Lance’s lover, no, it was that he’d never thought how far he’d e willing to go.

What exactly was the point of no return in weddings?

 

Well… for the two of them it’d be a text from sweet, sweet Hunk with attached cake design options and flavors. Lance was just going to have to get a shovel and keep digging the hole because there was no way in hell he’d break Hunk’s heart. Besides, there was probably some random guy on craigslist with all the wedding supplies needed to fake a wedding and get this over with. Acting like husbands for the rest of their lives wouldn’t be terrible, hell, everyone who saw them together though they were a thing anyway.

Lance just had to convince Matt it wouldn’t be that terrible.


End file.
